Newbie Night

   It was Monday, and my first Newbie Night!  After meeting my friends for a quick bite, we headed to the rink.  I pulled up my waiver from my email to show at the front desk, then paid my $15 (for the lesson, skate rental, and rink time), and received a wrist band.  We gave the man behind the skate counter our sizes, and I learned that all rentals are in men's sizes.  The general rule for women is to pick one size down from your normal shoe size.  

My skates for the night.

    There are no half sizes, so you have to go with your gut, or try on different pairs.  For example, I'm a shoe size 7.5 and chose a skate size 6, which would be the equivalent of 7 (there will be a test on this later).  I didn't notice until I had already laced up that there is a mat on the floor with outlines of shoes and the number of their size, which you just step on to make your decision easier.  We rented one locker for our belongings, and hobbled over the carpet to the rink floor.

You’re required to wear wristbands if you rent their skates.

    Remembering how to roller skate is NOT like riding a bike.  I felt like Bambi on the ice--I no longer trusted my legs.  I pulled myself along the half-wall encasing the rink, thanking my upper body strength and wondering who first thought, "Let's strap wheels to our feet and see what happens!"  Fortunately, we were told to line up against the wall, so I didn't have to let go.  

    Our instructor had us march and stomp our feet on the ground to get us moving, then taught us how to stop.  This is hard, and slightly terrifying.  Stopping abruptly interrupts your careful glide and can easily launch you into a faceplant, or an unintentional "running man" as your body refuses to let you fall.  I think the human body gets its most creative when trying to prevent self-harm on wheels.  This is why I added protective gear to my Amazon cart when I got home.  Often, the fear of falling can prevent us from trying something new, so why not arm myself the best I can so it won't hurt as much when the inevitable happens? (And yes, I'm going to allow roller skating to inspire some songwriting after this!)

    We also practiced falling, completely separate from practicing how to stop!  This was the more gentle practice, and I hope this is how it actually goes when my body DOES let itself fall--squat as low as you can, then "pick a cheek" and fall on that side of your bottom.  You don't want to "helicopter" or "windmill" (flail your arms around) because you are more likely to fall backwards and hit your head.  Did I say I'm afraid of falling?

    Hard to believe, but our instructor also had us practice skating backwards.  After each little drill to the middle of the rink, we skated back to my home base, the wall.  My shins were burning and the bottom half of my body was shaking, but it was time to clear the floor to let them sweep.  I don't know what happens during our lessons that makes the rink suddenly littered again, but I'll take a break if I'm offered one!!

    Once the rink was clear, we were all invited out for the Newbie Night Free Skate.  I forgot to mention one of the best things about Newbie Night--it's adults only.  Another great thing--showboating is essentially not allowed.  It's an equal playing field, so you can go as slow as you want, use the skate assist (wheeled walker) without shame, fall and wobble to your heart's content, and there are workers skating around in orange T-shirts who often catch up to you and give little pieces of advice and encouragement throughout the night.  It's wonderful.  I skated around, knees bent, ready to go into "chair pose" (the "I'm going to fall" squat) at a moment's notice.  Plenty of people fell, clutched the edge of the rink, and dropped their skate assists, but everyone got back up again.  I was so proud of all of us!

    I didn't fall, and I've been knocking on wood every time I mention this.  I successfully stopped a few times, but not at full speed.  I didn't try backwards skating, but I did make bubbles (skating your legs apart and then in, repeatedly).  I'm not looking smooth yet--my friend took a video from the sidelines, and I definitely looked like a toddler, the way I shifted my full weight leg to leg, back and forth.  Fortunately, I'm the kind who can laugh at myself, so whenever I flail my arms around before going into chair pose, or when more experienced skaters whiz past my toddler technique, you can usually find me cracking up, but also, for now, staying up (knock on wood).